Before I begin telling you about my adventure, let me assure you that it all really happened. Some things may even seem farfetched, but fear not. I have lived through it all, and am happy to tell you. I also have enlisted a "video game" to assist me in telling my story. Since I'm not good with these strange devices, I have enlisted the services of a good sir by the name of City Hunter to help me. City hunter.. Now that I think of it, he sounds sort of like me! Well, that is besides the point.
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"Well friends, what shall we do now for sport?" was what I had asked them. They seemed unsure and silent, as always. One finally spoke up, the one closest to me who was a frail, but quick witted merchant. I really hate my merchants. They never seem to care about much other than their business. I suppose I can't blame them.
"'Tis a beautiful day, my liege. Let us go out and ask the people to dance for us." he suggested. I thought the people would have gotten tired of dancing for us by now, but I guessed that it was alright to ask them just once more. What's in a little fun? So I happily told them, "An excellent idea! Come minstrel, you are needed!" And we walked out into the town for some song and dance. All was going well until a rich looking man in a red coat appeared. He had a troop of soldiers and some woman with him. People who tell my story try to say that I fell in love with Marian, but it isn't true at all. I hated her a great deal. Damn Mormons. Anyway, the once cheerful crowd quieted and stood away from the robed man, as if they knew to fear him. Finally we spoke.
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He began saying that the king had granted him my castle. Obviously, I was not willing to accept this so easily. "This is MY castle, and my people will never let you take it!" I told him boldly. Sadly, my people were not actually willing to help me. As they walked away, the robed man, who had identified himself as the Sheriff of Nottingham Shire, had a large grin on his face. Trying to keep my composure, I then insisted that my merchants would stand by my side. Sadly, they too cowered.
As they walked past me, I felt helpless, and depressed. I quickly walked away, outside the castle walls and sat on the ground. Pondering what I could possibly do about this, I heard nearby people mumbling that I wasn't such a great hero. Enraged, I decided to find this person. It was just some man wandering around town. Obviously these people were not going to help me, so I figured I would destroy those disloyal to me.
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I stood a good distance and took aim with my arrow. I let go, and the arrow hit him, right on target. With a scream, he fell dead. I felt a bit braver, and happier. Though I knew that perhaps it wasn't the right thing to do. Soon after I killed the man, I heard the funeral horns. News of death sure gets around quick in my land. I decided to let the man die in peace. The funeral men in their brown robes quickly carried him off, as if they had no other care in the world. I decided to skip the funeral. I'm sure it would have been a waste of my time in any case. Instead, there was an island just east of the town which I thought might prove useful, so I set off for it.
When I had finally reached it, there was a man standing on the other side of a bridge. He seemed like a very spirited man, calling out to me, "Ha! Who dares to cross my bridge? One more step and I'll have thy head off!"
I shook my head and replied, "Nay, I have no reason to fight thee." and turned to walk off, but the man suddenly shouted "Coward!" and began to assault me. Luckily I am quick, and I fired an arrow, which took his life quickly.
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