I've just about finished up work on the new site to host my upcoming serial fiction. You can check it out here.

There isn't much on it at this very moment since I'm not actually done writing it yet. However, there's still a small bit of introductory text to read there. If anything you should view the embedded youtube video featuring a guy with a great beard. I'm a very generous guy to introduce you to a man of such beardly goodness.

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Did I say, a few days ago, that I would post a progress report? I don't know what you're talking about. I would never promise something I know I'd be too lazy to do! Instead, you can have a clip from one of the greatest shows on earth:

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This message brought to you by the ultimate hacker, the one and only...

Pious Paste!

Hello you god damn PC using NERDS! It's me, Paste, the ultimate hacker who hacks with a Dreamcast! I used my deecee to hack this stupid idiot website YET AGAIN because that pcurzi guy is such a damn fool. This web server uses Linux, which is a horrible operating system. The only good OS is the one in the dreamcast, of course. So what is that stupid dumb doing these days? Oh yes, that ridiculous Garfield crap. I'll show you how to REALLY review a Garfield comic, you PC using fuckers.

God this strip is stupid. Jim Davis probably uses Windows for Workgroups to make these dumb strips. Garfield is a shitty character, the true funny guy is Sonic the Hedgehog, who was at his peak of greatness on the Dreamcast. Sonic started going down hill when those morons at Sega decided to go multi platform. Actually, the reason that all current Sonic games are shit is because I launched my dee cee missiles at Yuji Naka and gave him severe brain damage. After that, nothing was ever the same since everyone else is worthless at Sega.

Then that Macintosh using cartoonist idiot Jon is like “OH GARFIELD YOU ARE TOO STUPID TO TURN ON THE TELEVISION AREN'T YOU?” Then he leaves because he is also too stupid to turn it on. Garfield is like “WINDOWS IS THE BEST BILL GATES IBM!! CONTROL ALT DELETE win32 FATAL EXCEPTION!” because he is a pc idiot like the rest of you.

I guess this is a social commentary about television being boring, but I don't really care because the only reason to use a TV is to play the latest greatest dreamcast games. Long live the Dreamcast so that it will kill all of you worthless nerds!

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Here is one of my favorite songs as of late. It's "Dream Operator" by Talking Heads. This is the version that appears in David Byrne's True Stories. Definitely one of my favorite scenes in the movie.

There is another version which is sung by David Byrne himself. It's the same overall song, but I like his singing voice better. It is more meaningful in movie form, though.

In unrelated news, this site is suddenly in love with meeki.net again. pcurzi.net has always been a very amorous sort of thing in that way. Speaking of Meeki, I'll probably be posting a progress update later tonight, so stay tuned from that bit of excitement.

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I feel like I've woken up from a terrible dream. In this dream, I fell through an endless corridor, and there were a lot of orange cats hanging off the sides. As my falling body fell through, they were clawing at me terribly, and I died from my injuries. It was completely awful.

You know, before I say anything at all about the comic, I want to address something very important. It has to do with this “Bill Watterson” guy. Yeah, I'm bringing him into this, I'm summoning mister “GARFIELD IS CONSISTENT!!”

What's your problem, Watterson? Consistent? WRONG! Garfield is the most dynamic comic out there. I don't need jerks like you telling me that the Garfield comics never change. They change tremendously, my friend! No wait, you aren't my friend. I'm no friend to someone who bad mouths Garfield. What makes you think you have the right to speak badly about MY Garfield, huh? You probably think you're some sort of important water deity prince or whatever since your surname implies that you're the son of water. Well, let me tell you something, Watterson. You're a deity of nothing in my book.

You and your god damn Calvin & Hobbes, you think you're some sort of comics god because you didn't sell out. You're jealous, you're just jealous of Jim Davis. Old Jim's been in the comics longer than you ever will be, and his cat is still here long after your psychological six year old eternal child boy and his imaginary stuffed tiger. You're like “ohh I am some sort of moral man, I don't want to sell the soul of my comic!” and I think that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my life. You'll never have Davis' success and I hate you, you foolish landscape painting subhuman, go paint your giodo damn trees I don't want to ever see you again! God I miam angry at the meere thought of you.

Okay, I'm sorry. I have to keep my anger in control. I can't just be bad mouthing my enemies here. But let me just say that you're on my list, Watterson. You'd better keep up this hermit life of yours, because it's going to be war if you say something bad about Garfield again. Now onto the Garfield comic goodness.

This comic is funny because Odie is a dog. Notice how the couch is suddenly much closer to the television in the last panel. This is because Odie likes the All-Dog channel so much that he pushed the couch closer. Imagine that, a dog liking a channel about dogs so much that he would push a couch very slightly forward. Isn't that just grand? Someone kill me now, I beg of you.

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